The cool girl's guide on getting out of a slump

Sometimes the best way to get out is to give in.

Once in a while, something in life will inevitably get you down. So much so that without noticing, you’ve suddenly fallen into a slump. Your routines start to fall apart, motivation goes out the window, and getting through your day feels like trudging through quicksand. You never mean to fall in so deep but one day you’re just suddenly stuck and unsure how to pull yourself out.

Am I going through this right now? Kind of.

Do I feel like I have the tools to pull myself out? Yeup.

Have I done it? Not quite.

When life starts piling on the stressors, I always tend to fight back. There’s a fire in me that refuses to be put out so when hard times sneak up, I start doubling down.

I work harder, move my body more, eat healthier, and do more. On paper, it sounds like I’m fighting the good fight. Whether that’s what my body really needs? That’s an entirely different story.

I recently read milk & cookie’s article ‘why feeling lost might mean you’re finally doing it right’ and it triggered some uncomfortable realizations. She points out that we overvalue “clarity”, especially those of us who’ve made being ambitious, competent, and high-functioning our identities. There was so much of me I recognized in that article (honestly it was almost embarrassing but that’s shame and guilt talking, which needs to be an article on their own). But all in all it was a wake up call that it’s okay to feel lost sometimes.

“high-functioning adults who never had the luxury of falling apart because there was always someone else depending on them. for us, feeling lost can feel like weakness. like we’re failing at something we used to be good at.”"

Earlier this week, I was at a candlelit Yin yoga class, in the middle of a very deep hip stretch involving ropes and blocks to help us rreeaallyy get in there, when our instructor rang her sound bowl and lulled, “You’re fighting to hold on. You’re fighting to let go. Stop fighting yourself. Love your body, relax, let go.”

My eyes instantly welled up with tears because this timely comment was applicable to not only our stretch but how I’ve been generally feeling in most areas of my life. In trying to get back to a place where I feel good about my productivity, fitness, and mental health, I’ve actually been inadvertently holding myself back. When push comes to shove, instead of looking inward and listening to what my body actually needs, I’ve been leaning on external distractions to get me through the days.

Life will always and inevitably have it’s ups and downs. Instead of fighting to get back up when we aren’t ready to, what if we let ourselves stay down? Just for a moment, so that we can reset, regroup, and learn about ourselves.

What if the best way to get out of a slump is just to give in? In releasing control, we’re learning to trust that we’ve done enough work in our lives that life won’t start crashing down just because you’re taking a break. We’ve built the foundations that allow us to slow down and really examine what’s going on around us and within us. I promise (us both) that everything will be as it is when you come back.

So I guess I’m writing this for me as much as it’s for you. I needed a little reminder that there are other ways to “bounce back” that don’t include forcing myself to move forward when I’m not ready to. If you’ve also been in a slump lately, whether it’s personally, creatively, or professionally, here’s what I’ve been implementing in my life as a way of resetting.